The Book of Donuts and Humor
by Inu-Angel Z
Summary: Mr.Ericks, er, Vash loves donuts. And sometimes donuts can lead to a mystery. While at a new friend's house, Vash and Co. end up learning a very interesting secret. Mostly humor. Random, pointless humor.
1. The Begining and Donuts! YAY DONUTS!

The Book of Donuts and Humor  
  
Disclaimer: If I owned Trigun, do you really think I'd be writing fanfiction?!?!  
  
O/N Ok. I don't remember what I was going to say....X{  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*`*`Somewhere Vash and Co. Are Staying*`*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
Vash leaned on the kitchen table, looking miserable. Meryl sat across from him, a typewriter and cup of coffee before her. Vash stared at her pitifully. It had no affect on the smaller of the insurence girls whatsoever. He tried again, but just receved a glare from Meryl that made him flinch.  
  
Next he pouted. "Pweeze?"  
  
"No," came the instant answer. She didn't even look up from the report she was typing.  
  
Puppy dog eyes that made most people melt were the last resort. Keyword most. "Pretty pweeze with sugar coated donuts on top?"  
  
Taking a sip of her coffee, the smaller one glared at him again. "I said NO. That's final." Her temper was starting to rise. A little sign appears in her hair, behind her ear; 'Volcano warning! Run for your lives! She's gunna blow!'  
  
Vash didn't pick up on the warning signs, it seemed, and continued to pout. "Why not? All I want is~"  
  
He was cut off by Meryl shouting, "When I say no, I mean no! Can't you get that through your thick skull?!" Hitting him on the head hard over and over agian made Vash swirly eyed and unconscious. She stopped hitting him a few seconds after he was knocked out. "So there!" she said over his still form. Slapping him lightly on the head, she hesitated. A moment later, she still had her hand on his head and was absssently running her hands through his golden locks.  
  
She only noticed what she was doing when the doorbell rang. Quickly jolting her hand away, she jumped up. Heading towards the door, she smelled an all too fimilair scent. One that could make Vash stop in his tracks, or go crazy. It depended on what the scent was used for. The intoxicating smell was~  
  
"It's finally here!" Vash shouted as he ran at top speed to the door, knocking Meryl over in the process. Through the hall he went, leaving a turned over table and broken vase in his wake. Swinging the door open, it almost came off it's hinges. Standing on the otherside, smiling and not seeming to care the door had almost fallen off, was a thirteen year old girl in a navy uniform and red sash with bunches of badges sewn into it. Tucking a stray strawberry-blond strand of hair behind her ear, she asked, "Is," glancing at the clipboard she held, "Mr. Ericks Stryfe in this residents?"  
  
Vash smiled happily down at her, accually standing still. "I'm Ericks."  
  
The girl smiled up at him as well. "Hiya, Mr. Ericks. My name's Shisha, a Sun scout. I'm here 'cause you ordered 20 dozen boxes of donuts." She motioned to the car behind her. It was stacked with boxes upon boxes of donuts. The man before her began to drool with longing. Turning her marble eyes back to him, she continued. "That will be 80 double dollars, Mr. Ericks." She held out her hand, waiting.  
  
For a moment the look in her eyes reminded Vash a little of Meryl, but then it was gone. He shrugged it off, digging into the depths of his pockets to find $$ 80. Finally giving her the money over to Shisha, he waited for his donuts. Just thinking about it made him drool.  
  
His thoughts were interupted by a grunting coming from his beloved donuts! They had grown legs, piled on top of each other, and were coming toward him! Wait. That wasn't posible. It was just the Sun scout carrying seven boxes of donuts and coming toward him. She looked like she was about to drop one. Oh no! Impulsly, he caught the parcel before it hit the ground. He took 2 other packs from her and they headed inside.  
  
"Nice catch back there, Mr. Ericks. You're very athletic, I must say. First almost ripping the door off, then grabbing the falling box. You must really love donuts!" They were in the kitchen, setting down the donut boxes on the counter. Meryl had just stared into space, swirly eyed.  
  
The donut-lover just blushed in embarassment. "Well, of course. I have to be."  
  
Walking through the hallway, Shisha knelt down beside Meryl. Proping the smaller female up, she checked to see if she had anything broken. Smiling up at Vash, she stated, "She'll be fine. Next time, make sure nobody's in your way when you run down the hall." He stared at her surprised. "You made a lot of noise, you know. I'll get the rest of the donuts. Will you take her to her bed, please? She is your wife, isn't she?" Vash's face turned beet red. "I see her at the grocery store sometimes. She's very nice."  
  
The blushing Stampeede tried to stammer a reply, but gave up after a few attemps. Instead, he did as he was told.  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*Later*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
Shisha set the last box of donuts on the kitchen table. Dusting off her hands, she smiled at Vash as he entered. "Your donuts are all here, Mr. Ericks. I'd best be going now. If it's okay, I'd like to come over again. It's been fun."   
  
Vash stared at her, strangely serious. "Before you go, I'd like to teach you a lesson." Putting his hands behind his back, he continued, "The world is made of~"  
  
He was interupted by the girl doing as he did so often. "LOVE & PEACE!"  
  
Vash stared at her in shock. Under his gaze, she rubbed the back of her neck in embarrassment. "My little brother is one of the ones you teach and play with. I was the one who he mentioned. Hehe." As if suddenly realizing something, she reached into her duffle bag.  
  
Getting over his shock, he started to sweat a little. 'Has she realized who I am? That would be a shame, though. She seems really nice.' She looked up at him, worried, a book in her hand. "Are you alright, Mr. Ericks? You look pale."  
  
He sighed internally, releaved. "I'm fine. What's that book?"  
  
She smiled widely at him. "It comes with an order of 10 boxes or more." Holding it up, he stared at it. Very thick though the prize was, it seemed very light. The tittle: The Book of Donuts and Humor. Very interesting tittle.....  
  
Handing it to him, she bowed good bye. "I must go now. It was nice meeting you. See you again sometime, Mr. Stryfe." She went out of the kitchen and out the door. A car engine started and he saw a clowd of dust out the window to his left.  
  
"'Mr. Stryfe?!?!'" a voice stated questioningly from the kitchen exit. Twirling around, Vash saw an angry Meryl leaning against the door frame. She had finally woken up.  
  
"Hi Insurence girl," he said in a squeeky, scared vioce.  
  
"'Mr. Stryfe!'" Meryl began to lecture him.  
  
*********2 Hours Later*********  
  
Vash was sound asleep by the time she had finished. Milly was still out in her neverending search for pudding. Glancing at the peaceful shape that was Vash, she smiled slightly. 'He looks like a little boy like that. How cute!' Shaking her head, she tried to get rid of those thoughts. 'Where did they come from?!'  
  
Sighing, she went to her room and bed, leaving Vash snoring peacefully at the kitchen table.  
  
A/N Ok, this is suppost to be a oneshot story. Tell me if ya guys want more, please!  
  
Clicky the reveiw button!  
  
l  
  
l  
  
l  
  
l  
  
l  
  
l  
  
v 


	2. Shopping and Runins! YAY DONUTS!

Disclaimer: If I owned Trigun, why would I be writing FANFICTION?  
  
O/N Thanks for all the reviews! Enjoy the next chapter of The Book of Donuts and Humor.  
  
************Somewhere Vash and Co. Are Staying****************  
  
Vash awoke with the sun the next morning. Stetching, he had a cramp back and sore head. The gunman was VERY confused. 'Huh?' Then he looked around. The events of the other night finally came back to him. 'Oh yeah! Meryl hit me on the head after she heard Shisha call me Mr. Stryfe. She seemed worked up over nothing... If I gave them my real name, they'd just go running...' He pondered on why he was in the kitchen next, leaning against the table.  
  
A loud bang awoke him from his thoughts. Meryl stomped into the kitchen. She hadn't had her coffee yet. The samaller of the insurence girls didn't seem to notice him yet.  
  
Heading over to the counter, Vash tried to sneek behind her. 'Slowly now...That's right, just pore the hot water while I go...' He didn't make it to the door, only half way. 'Atleast it's a new record...' he thought dryly.  
  
Meryl was smiling evily. "Good motning, Vash-san. Could you do me a favor?"  
  
He gulpt, not knowing what to do. 'Run and hide or hope that she'll be nice. If I try to hide, she'll just chace me, like always. I guess I'll just do the favor. Please, Kami, let her be nice today!' "What do you want me to do?" he managed to squeek. 'Maybe if I act scared she'll take pity on her... Nah. That never works...'  
  
Her smile only broudened. "I'd like for you to go to the grocery store for me. We're almost out of food, and you know how Milly gets if she doesn't have pudding..."  
  
He internally sighed in relief, but externally he only nodded meekly. 'That doesn't sound too hard. I just hope nothing blows up there... Meryl would really have my hide then...'  
  
"Good." She reached behind her back and pulled out a stack of papers. Forcing them into the Stampeede's hands, she explained, "Here's all the things we need, organized in A-Z, department, how much we need, etc... Now go! I need to work on the next report to the boss." She shuved a stunned Vash toward the front door.  
  
When he was outside, he woke from his daze just in time to have the door slammed in his face. Clutching the papers he thought, 'She must have a lot of time on her hands, to type all this.' He shuffled throught the list, reading under NEED. 'Pudding, ink, greece, coffee grounds, tampons, new plunger, concreat, cigerates in Wolfwood's handwriting... No donuts?!?!'  
  
************At The Store**********  
  
A dust covered and beat up Vash walked into the store carrying the white and clean list. Kids had attacked him, thrown him on the ground, and started to wrestle with him. Shisha's brother, Jamey, had finally gotten them to stop and help build a house. 'What a weird town,' he though, heading toward the dessert aile. As he entered, he bumped into someone, knocking them down.  
  
"I'm sorry, sir, I wasn't watching where I was going," said a familair vioce. Shisha gave him a hands up. He was surprised by the strength behind her pull. "Oh, hello again Mr. Ericks! What a pleasent surprise! My brother wanted to know if you and your friends would like to come over to dinner tonight. It'll be very fun and there'll be plenty of donuts. I cook everything from scratch."  
  
Vash started to drool just thinking about homemade donuts. He hadn't had any fresh ones in a while. When he snapped out of it he replied, "Uh, sure. Let me check with them first." He thought for a moment, then asked, "Where do you live exactly? I'll tell Jamey the answer this afternoon."  
  
She smiled at him again, putting the weight of her picked up shopping basket from her right to her left hip. "Alright, Mr. Ericks. I'll have Jamey come by your house and bring you to ours. What are you looking for exactly? Those are a lot of papers."  
  
He nodded, suddenly remembering the 'list' of things they needed. "Meryl had some extra time, so she 'organized' the shopping list. I could use some help."  
  
"Ok. I'll help you after I finish my shopping. Be right back! I just gotta check out and give this stuff to Jamey." She hurried off toward the front desk, leaving him to fend for himself in the unknown world called GROCERY STORE.  
  
************A Few Moments Later**********  
  
Vash wandered around, not knowing where they would keep the next thing on the list. HE never had to use them. It was Meryl's idea. "You never know," she had said, "it might come in handy one day." Walking past the bathroom section, he stopped. 'It might be here,' he thought. 'Good a place as any to look.' As he walked in, someone call, "Mr Ericks! Where are you?!"  
  
He peeked his head out, looking in the direction the voice had called. Shisha stood there, empty handed, looking for him. Catching his eye, she headed towards him. 'I wonder if she'd know where it is. She's old enough to know about that kinda stuff.'  
  
She reached him, smiling as always. "What are you looking for now, Mr. Ericks? I'll help if I can. Jamey's taking the ingreedience for tonight home."  
  
He blinked at her and pointed to something on the list. "Do you know where that is? I don't know if you'd know, since you ARE kinda young, but really. Meryl says we need it."  
  
She blushed a little, covering her face in embarassment. "Accually, we need quite a lot of it at my house. It comes in handy."  
  
Vash blinked and stared at her, surprised. "Really? Do your parents use it too?"  
  
Letting her bangs cover half of her face, she said sadly, "It's only Jamey and I. He's not my real blood brother. We're both orfines. We have no memmory of our parents or our ages. He helps anywhere he can when he's not in school and I'm an assistant teacher."  
  
The sensitive man before her was crying. "That's so sad," he said through the tears, hugging her tightly. "You poor thing!"  
  
Two tears escaped her eyes, despite her need not to cry. She finally gasped, "No air. Need breathe." He let her go, appologizing. She shooking her head in response, saying it was ok. "Now let's go get that concreate! Since your wife said you need it, you need it!" She started off toward the back aile, Vash walking behind her, trying to find words to explain that the smaller of the insurence girls was not his bride.  
  
I wish.  
  
Vash stopped in his tracks, not sure where that had come from. 'Huh?'  
  
You wish. The vioce in the back of his head was at it again.  
  
'I would never wish something that would never happen.'  
  
Oh, really? It was questioning him. Just great, he was having a mental battle with himself.  
  
'Really.'  
  
You sure?  
  
'Yeah.'  
  
Your sure your sure?  
  
'Of course!'  
  
Are you sure your sure that your sure?  
  
'Yes!'  
  
Are you positvily sure that your sure your sure? Now THIS was getting confusing.  
  
'I'm positive already!'  
  
OK. Just checking.  
  
'Ok. Good.'  
  
'Are you alright, Mr. Ericks?' another familair voice asked inside his head.  
  
"Wha.......?"  
  
"I asked if you were alright. It seemed like you were having a fight with yourself. You looked funny with your face changing ever few seconds." She giggled, then pointed to something on the shelf behind him. "The extra strength concreate is right behind you, Mr. Ericks. Probably what Ms. Stryfe wanted."  
  
Vash looked from the concreate to the girl. "Listen, Meryl isn't my~"  
  
"Wife?" Shisha finished, picking the concreate container easily. Vash stared at her, his mouth a gape, trying to form words. All he come manage was "How?" before she cut him off again. "By the look on your face whenever I said that, I just knew. Did you take on her last name because you didn't like your old one or something?" She looked for the next thing on Vash's list. Finding it, she put it beside the concreate in the cart she had found.  
  
He nodded dumbly, following her and showing her the list when she needed it.  
  
************In the Street When the Shopping was Done((Around Noon))***********  
  
Shisha waved to Vash then walked towards the school. Heading in the opposite direction, he tried to balanse all the shopping bags without anything following out. Shisha had been kind enough to help him. At least he didn't have to worry about being attached be boys this time of day. It was lunch and they had to get ready for school after they ate. 'At least they're learning something, I bet, with Shisha the assistant teacher to most classes. When one teacher or more get sick, she takes over for them. I wonder how good she does....?' He shook it off, getting prepared for the leatcher that came with saying yes to the Sun scout before she had gone home. 'She seemed really happy...' He sighed, opening the door to his temporary home.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
A/N Hello again everyone! I hope you liked this installment of The Book of Donuts and Humor.  
  
Next Chapter:  
  
Milly and the Pudding factory!; The reading of a book!; Cats and underwear!; Miss Fix-it Meryl!  
  
Credits: (7! Wow! That's a lot! Tell me what you think, people, and even if the review gets newked, the answer will still be in the story.)  
  
YUKI-CHAN5~ I'm glad I made you laugh. More laughs from this chapter, I hope.  
  
EMILY~ Here's MORE! Donuts? Yes, Vash and most of the human people love donuts. I don't know if Knived does, though....  
  
SETS~ I'm glad you like my story. Here's the next update. Sorry it took so long. ACK! X{  
  
LAURA~ I will, and here it is.  
  
ANGELOLIGHT~ *Smile* I'm glad you like it. Here's more!  
  
ALLEN~ Yes, Vash gets hurt a lot by Meryl. I wonder why he lets her? He's a lot stronger.  
  
UR COOL~ Why, thank you. That's an interesting name. I'm gald you like my story and can picture it in your head. And it is an interesting relationship between Vash and Meryl. It's bounded to get even MORE interesting with me as the author.  
  
A few things you need to know about me.  
  
1} I like twists.  
  
2} The best gift in your reviews is to be honest with me. Tell me if it was funny enough and if it made you laugh.  
  
3} I like to make people laugh and am glad when people enjoy my storys.  
  
4} Flames will be used to make pizza and popcorn. I will have a party as a bonus story and the flamer will NOT be envited. If I DO get a flame, I will email the other reviewers and ask you some questions. So please, if you leave your email address, I'll tell you when I update or when the party is.  
  
Ja ne, peoples!  
  
Inu-Angel Z  
  
Click the review button and leave your email address. That's an order. 


	3. No Pudding and Getting Ready! YAY DONUTS...

Chapter Three of The Book of Donuts and Humor  
  
O/N Hello again. Enjoy the next crazy enstallment!  
  
***********At the Place Vash and Co. are Staying************  
  
"WHAT!?!" Meryl shouted, her hands in fists. "You did what?!?!" Some how the short woman was towering over the extremely tall Vash.  
  
"I said yes to an invetation to dinner for all of us," he squeeked, cowering until he felt a wall of the kitchen behind his back.  
  
"Do that mean you don't like my cooking?" The small woman atvanced toward him, drigger in hand.  
  
"NO! Meryl, you got it all wrong..." He dodged a shot, trying to get towards the door.  
  
Atleast, he thought that would be one of her reactions. Vash was standing out side the front door, reluctant to open it. Not that he could. The grocery bags fill with their 'nececities' took up all his arm room. He couldn't even see over them! He tried to think of some way to tell Meryl he was at the door.  
  
Then it suddenly hit him. Literally!  
  
Meryl looked down at down at him, holding the door open. She looked very surprised to see him. "Vash! It took you long enough!" Picking up three of the bags, she took them into the house.  
  
The gunman followed her into the kitchen, carrying the other seven bags. Setting them on the counter, he was suddenly interested in the floor. "Um....Insurence girl..... Iexceptedaninvetationtoadinnerforallofus. Pleasedon'tbemad!" He said the last part so fast, it sounded like chipmunchs given healium.  
  
Meryl looked up from putting some of the things away and asked, "What did you say, Vash? I didn't quite catch that last part."  
  
Vash continued to be interested in the floor, "I...um....Excepted a dinner invetation for everyone..." He waited for the yell, the hitting, the lecture. And waited. And waited some more.  
  
He finally got tired of waiting for so long, he looked up. Meryl was still putting things away, but smiling now. When she noticed Vash's eyes on her, she turned and looked at him.  
  
Smiling at him, she said happily, "That's great, Vash! Now I don't have to cook, and neither does Milly! What time?"  
  
Vash stared at her a moment, then her question registered in his head. "Oh...um...Seven."  
  
Meryl nodded, heading toward the door. Confused, the donut lover asked, "Where are you going?! It's only five!"  
  
The insurence girl stared back at him from the door way, about to go out. "Well, I first have to finish the new report to the boss, then tell Wolfwood and Milly about the dinner, and hopefully have enough time to get ready. So if you'd excuse me, I have a lot to do."  
  
Vashed nodded meekly and went back to putting the groceries away when he heard the door shut behind her.  
  
****************2 Hours Later***************  
  
Milly heard the door bell and stopped mid swing. "Pudding?" she asked childishly, walking towards the door. When she opened it, the boy with hair as short as Meryl's stopped his hand mid-knock.  
  
"Um...I'm here to take you guys to the house. Sis asked me to," he said shyly, rubbing the back of his neck.  
  
Milly smiled at him, letting him into the house. "Is there pudding at the dinner?" She seemed really....hungry....for some reason.  
  
"Uh...Yeah," he replied, staring behind her. The place was a mess. Wolfwood was on the floor, foot marks all over him. Meryl was no where in sight, but the sound of typing could be heared down the hall that Woldwood was lying in. The last membor of the group leaned against the wall by a door, sitting and swirly eyed. Milly had a bra sitting on her head, Wolfwood's cross in hand. "Don't you think you guys should get....uh....ready? Sis made the house fancy. Wear your best, I guess."  
  
Vash looked up at him, recovered. "Huh? She never said anything about that! What will I where?!"  
  
Woldwood was smoking another cigerate, leaning against the wall nonchalantly. "What kind of 'fancy'?"  
  
Jamey stared at them for another moment, then shrugged. "You might wanna wear a dress or tux. Sis wouldn't care. Xani Yue might, though." He was so lost in thought that when he walked a chair in the living room, he tripped over an odd looking black cat. He was very surprised when he landed in something soft.  
  
He lay there a moment, then looked around. He was on their couch, laying face down. "Who's Xani Yue?" he heard the one Shisha called 'Mr. Ericks' ask.  
  
"The lady we take care of. She gets sick real easy. Can you hurry up already? I have to be back by curfue." He was know for his impatients by the other kids.  
  
The adults went to their rooms, changing quickly.  
  
*************20 Minutes Later*************  
  
Jamey sat on the couch, dozing off. The slamming of a door woke him from his sleep. The grownups had finally come out. The woman Shisha saw at the store stood by Mr. Ericks, her dress fitting perfectly. The guys were in black suits and the brown haired woman was in a skirt suit, looking very perfesional.  
  
He nodded to them, walking toward the door, tripping along the way. "What happened here anyway?" the boy asked as he opened the door.  
  
The group glanced at each other, recalling just what had happened before the doorbell had rung.  
  
`*~Flashback~*`  
  
"What?!" Meryl yelled at the cowering Vash, holding a part of the shopping list he had used. 'The alfebetic part,' he noted, back squashed against the wall. "You what?!?!" Meryl was even more scary than usual.  
  
"I-I fo-forgot to g-get Milly p-pudding," Vash stammered, still trying to back away from her.  
  
Milly walked in, smiling widely. As she heard what Vash said, the big woman's face fell. "No pudding?" she asked childishly.  
  
Vash nodded, still 'scared.' Meryl didn't seem to want to help. "Vash here forgot to get you pudding." She pointed a finger at him, anger clouding her judgement.  
  
Milly seemed to tranceform, becoming scary. She trew out her spun gun, swinging it like a vacoom cleaner. She soon dropped it, however, when she smelled the unmistakable scent of pudding coming from the dirty clothes bin.  
  
The other two watched her as she dug through it, throughing the anything without the scent of pudding on the floor behind her. She once found an odd looking black cat, the poor thing. She threw the animal, along with some of her old under wear, into the pile as well. An orange bra got stuck in her hair, making Vash blush a dark shade of red.  
  
She finally found it. The thing that smelled like her beloved pudding. It was the shirt she had spilled some choclate pudding on the other day.  
  
Sweatdropping, she other two watched her continue looking for any trace of the desert.  
  
`*~***********One and 1/2 hours later***********~*`  
  
Milly now held Wolfwood's gaint cross, still in her lack of pudding mode. None of the stores had pudding, and everyone buy the one attacking was tired. That's when the doorbell rang.  
  
`*~End Flashback~*`  
  
Everyone shook their heads in union, not wanting to tell. Jamey shrugged, stepping out the door. "Fine, then. Just hurry up. Xani Yue hates people who are more than 'fashinably late.'"  
  
The impatient boy climbed into the car, the guests behind him. They sped off to the North, toward Shisha's house and dinner. Little did they know, they were also going to descover the Secret of the Silver Family.  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
A/N What did you guys think? Good enough? I hope so. Tell me if you laughed, please.  
  
Ok, so no Miss Fix-it Meryl and a book reading, but this story accually has a plot along with humor.  
  
Next Chapter:  
  
Dinner and book reading; Mystery woman; Start of a mystery  
  
Cresits:  
  
LAURA~ I tried to upload this as soon as possible, but here anyway.  
  
ALLEN~ Your right. Is it funny or not?!  
  
GUARDIAN ANGEL OF LIGHT (2)~ Wow! Two reviews! Cool! Yeah, my story is weird and funny at the same time, ne? I'm glad I make you laugh!  
  
Click the review button. You know you want to. 


	4. New Woman and Complications! YAY DONUTS!

The Book of Humor and Donuts  
  
Chapter Four  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
Vash and Co. followed Jamey into the richly decorated house, staring around in awe. 'I never knew Shisha and her brother were so well off,' thought Vash, a golden and red pheonix statue staring at him with ruby eyes. 'I won't mind living here. From the sacuriety system installed here, no bounty hunter would be able to get past it. I wonder how they used the old tecknologie like that?'  
  
His wonderings were interupted by running into Meryl, who had stopped as Jamey did. He almost fell over, and would have taken Meryl with him, if it wasn't for Shisha catching his shirt before he could fall. The mentioned short one was a little disappointed. 'I probably would've yelled at him, though,' she thought sadly, staring around Vash and at the one who had caught him.  
  
You would've liked that, huh? Meryl had a voice in the back of her head, too. One that sounded so like her roommate before Milly.  
  
'Why would I want Vash to fall on top of me?' she questioned herself, still staring at the girl in the fancy dress who had prevented it from happening.  
  
Come on, admit it. The stars are in your favor for romance this week, you know. Now it was being freaky again. How did it know about the stars? Could it see at all?!  
  
'Why would I care about the stars? How do you even know that?'  
  
I know because you read all those astrology books in highschool. Remember? I know even more about you then you do yourself. Huh? Now this was getting confusing....  
  
'How can you know more about me then I know myself? Aren't you part of me? And don't tell me I have to see more images...'  
  
Hehehehe. You never should've agreed to have visions if you didn't want them. And yes, I am part of you. Now, for today's images.... And the voice showed her more images.  
  
Vash stared at Meryl strangly, for she had gone the way she did when staring at the typewriter or out the window sometimes. Shisha, after prevented him from falling on her, looked the same as Meryl.  
  
The small insurence girl snapped out of it first, shaking her head to clear it. The younger girl followed suit, smiling and releasing Vash. Before anyone could ask questions, a beautiful Asain woman stepped in gracefully, her attention on Shisha. "What is taking so long, Mistress? Is somehing wrong?" asked the woman, seemingly not noticing the others in the room.  
  
"Dinner will be in a moment, Miss Yue. Let me introduce you to our guests." She continued to smile at Xani Yue, the beautiful woman turning her attention with a swoosh of her silken kimono to the four guests. "This is Miss Meryl Stryfe," Meryl smiled, bowing, "Mr. Wolfwood," the preist nodded his acknowledgement to her, smoking another cigeratte, "Miss Milly Thompson, "Milly smiled cheerfully and nodded a 'hello', "and Mr. Ericks Stryfe." Vash didn't give any movement except for drooling over Xani Yue. He did nodded, however, after Meryl hit him on the head.  
  
Jamey tried to hide his laughter. Sure, Xani was beautiful and all, but living with her personality was way different than just admiring her beauty. The woman could be a hand full, but atleast his sister was pactient. She could act like a saint sometimes.  
  
There was a ding from the kitchen and Shisha went rasing, muttering something about pies. Jamey was left to take care of his charges. Luckily Xani didn't feel like conplain in the presence of the other guests. Atleast she was being polite, something she was raised to be, even if she didn't act the 'lady' often.  
  
Vash was still staring at the Asain woman when they entered the banquet hall. It was beautiful, with marble walls and sandstone floor. Piller upon marble piller trimmed with gold lined the walls, holding the ceiling up with little effort. The oak table was set with silver, the cups crystal with blood red wine. Paintings stood between each pillar, scenes of the old world only Vash knew somewhat about. There was one painting that he didn't really like. It was that of a spider web and butterfly, the cycle of the world.  
  
When everyone was settled in their seats, the gunman stared across at Xani and tried to act like a gentleman. 'I guess it wouldn't hurt to act the part,' he thought, grinning goofily. 'I hope I don't destroy anything. Shisha is a very nice girl.'  
  
Not causing Meryl any trouble is what you really want. Not again! He hated argueing with himself. Where did these voices come from, anyway?  
  
'Go away! I'm buisy right now!'  
  
Alright, alright. Just to warn you, this place isn't as it seems. You'll see. With that, the voice was gone and another said something.  
  
'Mr. Ericks, would you like anything more?'  
  
Snapping out of his daze, Vash glanced around. Almost everyone was done with their meals, and his plate was almost empty. 'I don't even remember eating.' Shisha was holding a half eaten blueberry pie, a delicasy among the humans. Milly was eating a piece, surrounded by empty pudding containers. A maid was picking some up, trying not to be noticed by anyone.  
  
"Uh...." He didn't know what to say. What was the question? Oh yeah, did he want any pie. 'I guess a piece would be alright.' "Uh...Yes, please." Meryl was glaring at him and Xani was no where to be seen.  
  
Shisha nodded, giving him a small piece. He didn't seem very hungry. "Mr. Ericks, I would like to read something to everyone. There will me donuts, of course." At the mention of h is beloved pastry, Vash's mouth started to water. The Sun scout smiled in amusement, Meryl glaring at the donut craving man.  
  
"Donuts..." Vash stated gleefully, eating his pie in two bites. He had to admit, it tasted very good. He hadn't had anything fruit flavored in a long time. It was rare and caughst much money. 'Why would these kids have a house on fertle ground? Did one of them inherit it? Shisha said that she wasn't related to Jamey. Adopted? Maybe.'  
  
He woke from his ponderings just in time to follow everyone into a sitting room to listen to a book reading.  
  
***********A few Hours Later***********  
  
Everyone but Shisha, the reader, sat laughing. Even Wolfwood, who chuckled. She'd been reading from a copy of the book Vash had gotten with his donuts, 'The Book of Donuts and Humor.' It was humor based stories written by someone who's name Meryl couldn't pronounce, all having atleast one scene with donuts, hense the tittle.  
  
'The last was an interesting story,' she thought, sighing/  
  
Yeah, but I like it. Why the heck was her 'little voice' back?!  
  
'Why are you here now?!'  
  
To tell ya something. If ya don't wanna know, I could go back to reading tarrot cards.  
  
'How can you read tarrot cards in my head?!' This was getting no where.  
  
Yeash. You don't wanna know. Now, I came ta warn you about the girl. Interesting...  
  
'Shisha? Why? She seems harmless.'  
  
Yeah, but she isn't. She has more power then you. She had a clearer vision then you.  
  
'Is that all? Let the universe have her as a Seer, then. I don't really like my visions, even if they are kinda blured when I don't know what to look for.'  
  
That's-  
  
'Enough. Go away.'  
  
"Are you alright, Ms. Meryl?"  
  
That awoke her from her thoughts. "Y-yes. Yes I am. Now, if will excuse me, were is the restroom?" she asked nervously, avoiding everyone's eyes.  
  
Shisha smiled at her, not showing her confusion. "Down the hall to the left, third door on your right. Please don't make too much noise. Miss Yui is sleeping. She needs all the rest she can get." Nodding in understanding, the nervous woman followed Shisha's instructions.  
  
A few moments later, Meryl was leaning against a metal sink splashing water on her already damp face. 'What is going on here?!' There was a loud crash and shouting as the room seemed to move. Hanging onto the sink for dear life, the smaller insurence girl screamed, "What the heck is going on?!" The shaking stopped abruptly, causing her to fall against the wall. Stunned, she didn't notice anyone else in the room.  
  
A kind voice asking if she was alright awoke her from her stunned state. The young girl leaning over her appeared to be Shisha. Something solid was gently placed before her mouth. "Drink, please, Miss Meryl," said the kind voice, erging ther woman to take the bottle. It was a sweet tasting water, something in it reminded Meryl of coffee. "You should be fine now, Miss Meryl. It seems Miss Yui lost her temper again."  
  
Surprised, Meryl tried to sit up only to find herself dizzy again. "Just a moment, Miss Meryl. The first time Miss Yui used her powers around me, I became dizzy and light headed just as you are. Sit and rest while go make sure everyone else is alright." With that, Shisha left the other female to rest and think.  
  
'Powers!' she exclamed in her mind. 'It seems like everyone around here has powers!'  
  
***************In Another Room*************  
  
Jamey sat with Xani Yui, trying to calm her. The poor girl had gotten quite a scare when someone had tried to kidnap her again. The offenders were now laying knocked out on the floor, rubble surrounding them. The still shocked woman was muttering to herself, holding tightly onto the boy. He spoke to her softly, wishing his sister was here. She always knew what to do, it seemed like. Ever since he had met her all those years ago.....  
  
The door opened and the girl entered, sighing. Snapping her fingers, the lights turned back on and the bandits vanished. "Are you alright, Miss Yui?" Her voice was soft, kind and soothing, drawing the crying woman's attention. Hic-uping, Xani Yui nodded, still cluching to Jamey. Sinking into a chair gracefully, Shisha smiled sadly. "I'm sorry that you're going through this, but you know you must stay here. They must not know who you are, Mr. Ericks and his friends, nor what I have become. Jamey, please stay with Miss Yui for the night. I will send tea." Standing, Shisha exited, leaving the boy and still-sniffing woman alone.  
  
Leaning against a door nearby, Vash stepped out of the shadows. He had heard everything and now knew something was up. This girl was not like the others, neither was Xani Yui. Shisha stared at him, not surprised at all. "I guess you want to question me now," she stated quietly, her bangs covering her eyes.  
  
Vash just nodded, following the girl to another, quite room where they wouldn't be interupted.  
  
*************Outside the Room Where Wolfwood and Milly are************  
  
Meryl walked slowly down the hall, leaning against the wall for support. Stopping for a rest, she heard Wolfwood and Milly's voices' coming from the room across from her. Before she could stand again, a very interesting noise drifted out and into her ear. It was a moan from Milly....  
  
"To the left and a little harder, please, Mr. Priest." That was Milly. 'She couldn't be.....'  
  
"That better?" came Wolfwood's voice followed by a pleased sound from her partner. 'What the heck?!...'  
  
"You're even better at this than Middle Sister!" '.....O.o...'  
  
"Really? That's a surprise. I haven't done this in a while." '.....O.O...'  
  
"We should do this more often!" exclaimed Milly happily. Wolfwood made an agreeing sound. It seems it was his turn for what ever they were doing....  
  
Before it could go on anylonger, Meryl jumped up with renewed strength and through open the door, only to be greeted with a sight that made her gape. She hadn't been expecting THIS....  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
A/N I hope you liked the new installment of The Book of Humor and Donuts. I finally got into a writing mood! ^^ And next chapter, I'm going to have a party.  
  
Next chapter: Tales, things unexpected, and new callings.  
  
Credits:  
  
SETS17: Glad you like my fic. Another chapter for ya!  
  
guardianangeloflight: I finally updated! Hope you like it! ^^ 


	5. History Tales and Surprises! YAY DONUTS!

The Book of Donuts and Humor  
  
Chapter Five  
  
O/N: I know at lot of people don't read the Aurthor's Notes and things. Since no one left stuff for the PARTY, I'll make it next chapter. If you want to have an original character or yourself at the extra PARTY thing I'm writing next chapter for the finally, just fill out the form at the end of this chapter and put it in a review or send it to my email at:  
  
inu_angel_z@yahoo.com  
  
Warning: This capter is a little more serious then the others. More plot in this one.  
  
On with the story!  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
Vash stared at the girl, her eyes covered by her bangs. He was waiting for her to speak. He felt if he did, it would either interupt something or cause an unbalancement in the feel around them. He heard her sigh quitetly and watched as she moved her head upward so he could see her eyes. Shisha wasn't focused on Vash, though, but on a wonderfully done oil painting of a beautiful woman with flowing dark hair and eyes the same as Jamey's. She sat on a painted velvet chair, the same real one across the room from them. Her gown was the same purple color, though a lighter shade if you looked closely, as the chair, fingers ringed with only gold and emerald on two fingers. She was married.  
  
"'Jasmine Emeraldmyst, Beloved Mother and Treatured Daughter/Wife,'" Shisha read the engravings in gold under the frame. She had a look in her eyes, sad but thoughtful. Smiling slightly, she continued in an almost emotionless voice, "She was a nice lady, always polite. She was fun to be with even though she was shut away most of her life. I knew her well enough, being another girl helped. She stayed away from men mostly. Her sons and huspand were the only exceptions."  
  
Vash stared at her, not interupting, only watching. He then noticed engravings below wat Shisha had read. The years she was alive were....only about seventy years after the humans came to Gunmoke?! How could a girl that old look so young?!  
  
The mentioned continued to look at the painting, seemingly unaware of the gunman's gaping gaze. What she said next was another matter. "Yes, I did know her. She is Jamey's mother." Turning her head in Vash's direction, she smiled slightly. "I am that old. I shall make this as short as I can." With that her explaination began.  
  
"When Jamey found me I didn't remember who I was. Nothing of my past memories existed in me. I had the body of a five year old, I think. I'm not really sure. Well, Jamey found me in the desert by old recage when was was out riding. He took me back home, to this house. His mother had just lost a daughter and, even though I looked nothing like her, adopted me as a replacement. Jasmine's huspand was a kind but stern man and was opposed to the idea, but let me stay for his beloved's happiness.  
  
"Several years later I looked as I am now. Jasmine died giving birth to a daughter, her sixth and last child. That day also I remembered who I was. I also remembered my powers. Everyone was scared of me but Jamey, who was about seventeen at the time but still had the body of a ten year old. He had awakened to his powers before me." Shisha paused, turning her attention back to Vash. Her gaze had wandered back to the woman's painting as she spoke of her.  
  
"Have you seen then paintings in the dining room? Those are picture of how Earth looked, the home planet before we came here. I remember Earth. Before the spaceships had ever been built, there were experiments going on with the human physcy. I was one of the succsessful projects. Jameys and Ms. Meryl are decendents of my 'brothers' and 'sisters'."  
  
Vash stared at her, speachless. He thought she was done, but she really wasn't. "I am not human, Mr. Ericks. Neither is Jamey. Ms. Meryl has only awakened partly. I hope she stays the way she is. If she awakens, she won't be as strong as first or fourth generations like Jamey and I, but she will lives as long as she decides to."  
  
The gunman stared at her still, thinking. 'There are others not human.' Alteast he wasn't alone. But one thought hit him hard, 'She's older than me!' For some reason this bothered him. 'A girl who looks like a teenager is over a 100 years old. And she's stuck in that form like I am.'  
  
***********The Room Where Xani Yue was Attacked**********  
  
Xani Yue had stopped cry and was now drying her eyes. "Is she going to tell him EVERYTHING?"  
  
Her question surprised Jamey. She had never attacked like this before, always the spoiled brat. "I think so. He isn't as he seems, just like us."  
  
She stared at him. She knew Jamey was older than her, and that Mistress was close to him. That was about it. They acted like brother and sister, even if they weren't blood related. The only sure thing she did know about him personally was that he was WAY older than her and she was a desendent of one of his sisblings. "I know that."  
  
She did. One of her powers was being able to scence things that other people couldn't, like when someone was lieing or hiding something important. She could also see human auras and such. Every Awakened, as they called themselves, knew the difference between a human and another of their own kind. Mr. Ericks was neither, and she had only heard of one other like him.  
  
"You must sleep now." He didn't sound like he normally did. 'Atleast I know where he's going,' thought Yue as she watched him walk toward her. "I shall escort you to your room."  
  
She just nodded, taking the shorter person's offered arm and letting him lead her out the door and down the hall.  
  
**********To Meryl and the Uknown Scene************  
  
Wolfwood was on his stumic, Milly bending over him. They were fully clothed, relaxed also. Meryl was staring at them and gaping as they stared back at her. "What are you two doing?!" she finally managed. Milly pointed wordlessly to a gaint sheet of paper. On it were detailed drawings of human bodies, man and woman, with presure points in different colors.  
  
"Oh." Meryl felt kinda...dumb. Backing out the door, she closed them and leaned against the wall.  
  
So you feel stupid. Sometimes you are. NO! It was that 'little voice' again! When would it ever leave her alone?!  
  
'What do you want?'  
  
You could be a little more polite. I'm just trying to help, ya know.  
  
'....Tell me and go away...'  
  
Fine, fine. Just wanted to tell ya that Shisha is not Shisha.  
  
'Whatever. Will you stop bothering me and go now?!' You're really annoying, she wanted to add but didn't. If she did, the voice would stay even longer.  
  
Fine. And it was finally gone.  
  
With that, Meryl set off to find Vash and Shisha.  
  
*********Shisha and Vash Room**********  
  
"And Xani Yue?" Vash was curious, something that didn't happen often.  
  
"She is a desendent of Rose Emeraldmyst, sixth child of Jasmine and sister to Jamey. She takes after her mother greatly, but has the family's deep green eyes. Though hers are a little darker than normal." Vash just nodded.  
  
Shisha was staring at him again. "I am only called Shisha by most. Xani Yue calls me Mistress since she doesn't like to call me by my name." Pausing, she turned her gaze to a covered painting. "Would you like to learn it? No one but Miss Yue and Jamey know it. The three maids and housekeeper here call me Shisha as well."  
  
Vash nodded slightly, blue eyes fixed on her movements. She had walked over to the only covered painting in the room and was now removing the cover. Folding the clothe Shisha stepped away, letting him have a clear veiw of it.  
  
A painted girl a few years younger, but looked the same as, Shisha steadily gazed back at him. Her red gown fit perfectly, the hanging silk sleeves dangingly off her wristes. She held a white rose in one hand, the thorns not percing the skin, a red one in another. Her hair was braided with copper threads. She stood, a crystal lake out the stained glass window behind her. The artist had captured her perfectly. So perfectly it looked almost real. Vash was awed.  
  
"That is me only two years before I awakened. This was done by the third child of Jasmine Emeraldmyst, Lavender Emeraldmyst who had powers with painting. She could capture anything on canvase and make it look almost real." She was smiling at a happy memory as she said this.  
  
Vash looked at the copper marker under the portrait. It read:  
  
'Aurora Rubyrain, Child of the Night and Friend to All'  
  
'Aurora, the Northern Lights.' They had them even on this planet. There was something weird about the surname, though. Since he was curious again, Vash asked about it.  
  
Shisha, now Aurora, just smiled at him. "Emerald was the color of their eyes, the family's dark green trademark. Myst was for their cloaded powers. Not everyone had them in the family. For me, I was covered in blood when Jamey found me, hence ruby. Rain, ironicly, is because I never cryed. I never spoke until I awakened."  
  
Vash nodded in understanding.  
  
Aurora's face became serious. "You know a lot more than anyone, really. There is one thing about our powers. We call ourselves the Awakened. There are many more of us than people know, and we can tell if someone is human or one of us by as much as a glance." She paused for a moment, then continued, "You are neither. I only know of like you...like you. The powers you give off are as strong, I think as my own. And I was the last successful experiment on Earth. Everything they knew already, they tried on me."  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
A/N Well, I hope you liked it. The next chapter is the last chapter. I only do six chapter per story. I don't know why.  
  
Next Chapter: Together again, more surprises, and leaving.  
  
Note: IF YOU WANT TO BE WRITEN IN THE PARTY PART NEXT CHAPTER, FILL OUT THE FORM BELOW. Thank you.  
  
Form:  
  
Name:  
  
(color)  
  
Hair:  
  
Eyes:  
  
(You don't need to put a lot of detail if you don't want to.)  
  
Clothes:  
  
Breif How You/They Act:  
  
Credits:  
  
guardianangeloflight: Thanks for reveiwing. Sorry this chapter is so late. Computer trouble and everything.  
  
Sets17: Thanks! ^^ Now that you know what happened, what do you think? Love&Peace!  
  
Claymade: I'm glad you like it. I know my style isn't really like most people's. But most seem to like it for some reason....^^?  
  
Reveiw. You know you want to. 


	6. Past and Fun? YAY DONUTS!

The Book of Donuts and Humor  
  
Chapter Six  
  
A/N No one wants to be at the party! Oh well. I'll just add a bonus chapter if someone would fill out the form in the last chapter. Stupid people. Don't you even read the Author's Notes?! I bet not. And the only reason I put stuff here is to give an annousement. Oops! I'm ranting, aren't I? One with the story!  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
"How did you-?!" Before Vash could finish, Aurora interupted him.  
  
"I've met your brother, Mr. Ericks. It was a pleasent meeting, believe it or not. He really cares for you, you know. He thinks the 'spiders' have brain washed you or something. He stayed here as well." She just smiled kindly, a good front smile that didn't reach her eyes. She was a lot like Vash, in some ways. "You are Vash the Stampede, Humaniod Typhoon with a bounty of 60 billion double dollars on your head, correct?" The look on Vash's face was her answer.  
  
She just laughed. He'd looked worried, like she was going to reject him for who he was. That wasn't possible. They were kin, in a way, as she would soon explain. "No need to worry, Vash-san. I won't tell your brother you were here. That would cause unneeded attention from the already wary villagers. The only reason they let me teach in their school is because I know so much."  
  
She stood, replacing the curtain over her picture. "I will explain more of my past to you, if you wish. And no need to talk. I can speak mind to mind with you, like you do with your brother. I already have before, and you didn't seem to notice." The gunman's face was expressionless as he followed her. She knew he had a lot to think about, like weither or not to trust her.  
  
She turned back to look at him, not stopping her walking. Her face was serious, but there was also a mishcheifous tint to her eye. 'But know this, Vash; You are not alone. There have been other Plants such as yourself. And I am related to you and your kin, in a way.' That left him one more thing to puzzle over.  
  
*********Jamey and Xani Yue**********  
  
They'd arrived halfway to Xani Yue's bedroom when a door opened and Milly and Wolfwood stepped out. They looked calm, not lost at all. And they had just come out of the ciroprater's room. 'I wonder what they did in there,' thought Jamey, stopping as his charge did. 'Sis was teaching me some of that stuff a few years ago. Just enough to get by, atleast. Normal human's are so fragile, I wonder how they can stand it. Of course, that's all they've known.'  
  
Milly was the first to spot them as her friend lit a cigerate. Some how they had survived the trembling and were still smokable. The cigerates, that is.  
  
Milly waved happily at them, pulling Wolfwood and his cross with her. He seemed to never leave the thing, just like Meryl had a few drigers with her. The bigger of the insurence girls smiled happily at them as the priest leaned against the wall nonchalantly. Jamey smiled in return, his eyes on Xani. Sis had told him to take care of her, so he had too, or she would get mad. Not real mad, that would be even more dangerous, but mad enough to probably hurt him on accident.  
  
Xani cracked a smile, standing as straight as she could after using so much energy. Wolfwood was staring at nothing, it seemed, but Jamey had lived long enough to know what humans thought without reading their mind. His total attention was on them, Xani, Milly and himself. This could be interesting.  
  
"Hey! There was an eathquake and the house started shaking. What happened? Is everyone alright?" The questions seemed innocent enough, but Wolfwood was listening closely to enery word they said. The speaker, Milly, seemed genuenly concerned.  
  
"Everyone's fine, Miss Milly. Are you alright?" was Jamey's reply. Xani didn't say anything, letting him handle this. She was too tired anyway. She hadn't seem practicing her powers resently because the villagers had become even more nervous and wary around them. Of course, his charge never left the grounds, let alone the house. That was way she was so pale. She hadn't been getting much sun.  
  
Milly just smiled and answered cheerfully, "We're fine! Do you know where Meryl and the others are?" Wolfwood was still listening attentively, but Jamey answered truthfully nonetheless.  
  
"Mr. Ericks is with Sis. I don't know where Meryl is. We haven't seen her."  
  
Then Xani stepped in, fianlly. "Would you all care to have tea in my room? We needn't go to the kitchen-I have a way to make it on my own." Jamey hoped it was the stove as Milly excepted for them both.  
  
As they walked, Wolfwood knew that Knives would be VERY interested in this.  
  
**********Vash and Aurora/Shisha*********  
  
Aurora led Vash into a hige white room. She walked over to the wall beside the door after closing it. A control panal popped out and she began to type. Vash knew this was lost tecknowledgy, something he had never seen. It was the kind of thing Rem had told him about-a holographic simulater that felt and looked real. This was even before his time, things that had supposibly been stuck on Earth.  
  
Aurora stopped typing and stared at the cealing expectingly. There was a flash of light that blinded him for a moment, then he was standing in a feild like the one in the ship that brought him here-SEEDS. Something was bounding toward him, something he had only seen in books and videos. It was a canine being chased by it's owner. Suddenly the dog was gone and he was being chased. That is, until the guy through a ball at him. It almost hit him in the head and-  
  
The feild was gone. He was in the white room again with Aurora looking appoligetic. "That was a dog training simulation. Sorry. Let me try again."  
  
~*~*~*Twenty Tries Latter*~*~*~  
  
The cannon balls rained down on Vash, passing right through him. They stopped suddenly and a rather hysterical Aurora stood laughing at him. He just glared at her, wondering if she was doing this on perpose. Dog training, potty training, rythmic gymastics, football practise, and hair styling were only some of the programs he'd gone through. The last one had been a remake of a pirate battle, he knew not why anyone in their right mind would want to go through it.  
  
Aurora turned serious and lifted up her blouse sleeve. They were long and flowy blue things that matched her eyes. He hadn't known why she'd worn long sleves in the desert all the time, but now he did. There was scars worse then his from her elbow up, horrible things that looked like she had been stuck with a needle involunterily multiple times. Her arm began to transform, like his did when he used the Angel Arm. But it didn't look like a weapon at all. There was no pain on her face either.  
  
Her fingers formed together, creating something that would fit into a newly appeared hole in the wall. She stuck her hand in up her elbow then withdrew it a second later. Her hand returned to normal as a new control board came out the wall.  
  
'No need to be shocked, Vash-san,' said her voice in his head. Her face was serious, but her eyes were smiling. 'I am not even in my true form. Also, I just uploaded some of my memories into the computer. I will show you my life now, if you wish.'  
  
He nodded in reply, expression grave. This could be a long one.  
  
`So you know, it took hours to explain. You, reader, have been in thier minds and see how they think. I am Aurora, the one reporting this. I will just give you the short version of information. While this was going on, the other guests, including Meryl, had tea and sake and passed out. I won't envy Mr. Wolfwood in the morning. He'll have a headache as big, maybe even bigger, than Milly's.  
  
Short Info:  
  
I was born around 2009 and frozen for testing when I was only four. My mother had been a pateint of my late father and been murdered by her. When she gave birth to me, she named me Shisha Rose, a beautifully cursed name. That was the same name as her scientist mother. She abandoned me and I was found by the Angency my father had worked for. Knowing that they would be short of subjects to test in the future, I was frozen and forgotten.  
  
When the testing started for my kind, I was unforzen and given the latest sample. My brain excepted it but my body didn't. Since the tecknowledgy had advanced much in the twirty years I was frozen, they replaced my body. It was almost the same, a body of a distent relitive the same age. By same age, I mean four, not twirty-four.  
  
After ten years of switching bodies and testing, I was frozen again. Since I was the highest advanced at the time, and the most likely canidate for 'Queen', as they called it, I was needed to be the last subject. Years went by and I was never reawakened.  
  
When they finally unfroze me again, I was in a six year old's body. I noticed someone like my mother also being unfrozen, and it was her. She didn't know me, but I knew her the way a child knows it's mother. After that, I learned she was a canidate of the SEEDS project, the one Vash was a resolt of. She became pregnate and gave birth to the only lone Plant child. The rest were born as twins. No one knew why.  
  
I was raised with her for a few years, until my body became useless again. They put me in a new body, a Plant body. She knew me when she was me. I knew her, of course. And we got a new nurse. Rem's great-grandmother, I think. Someone related to her.  
  
Well, my half sister's brain failed after a terrible test, and my body was becoming useless too. It had been only ten years since the last replacement. I was given my sister's body. The body held my power and is the one I am in now.  
  
It was around 3002 when everyone had to leave Earth. I was in the last ship, the one that crashed here after floating in space for a while. This new body was frozen and was aging backwards. I don't know why it was, but it did. You know the rest.`  
  
When Aurora finally finished her tale, even though she had only shown him her memories and not talked, Vash was crying. He'd heard sad things, lived through sad things and depression, but he hadn't thought anything like what had happened to her could accually happen. Know what I mean?  
  
Aurora just smiled, a true smile. Only Jamey knew some of this. Vash and Knives, who were her 'brothers' and the other Plants that helped the humans were her brothers and sisters as well, were the only ones that knew. Knives hadn't seemed moved when he showed him, just more descusted with the 'spiders'.  
  
The gunman wiped the tears away. Something so terrible happening to her made what had happened to him look like a simple drama, atleast to him.  
  
"You and Knives are the only ones that know, now. Use this knowledge wisely. And remember this, Vash; if you ever need anything, just come to me. That includes your friends too. Now, let us sleep. There is a bed ready for you upstairs." She pressed a button on the control panal and the sitting Vash was lifted through the roof by the floor. Aurora stayed where she was, smiling at the painful memories.  
  
********The Next Morning********  
  
Meryl awoke to the light of dawn. She remembered last night, the drinking she hadn't taken part in and the tea. She was tucked up against something nice and warm, comfortable even. She snuggled against it more, her half asleep brain not registering what it was. For some reason it shifted, and she grab onto it, hugging it tightly.  
  
Vash awoke to something warm against him. It seemed small and delicate, fragile even. He was still mostly asleep, Aurora's explaination out of his mind at the moment. The something against him moved, making him uncomfortable. He shifted as well. When it hugged him tightly with thin arms, he became wide awake.  
  
Meryl was against him, hugging him tightly. This was scary. If she woke up and they were in this position, he would get a good head smashing. He tried to move slowly away from her, trying not to wake her. She only gripped tighter. As he resorted to prying her off, Meryl's steel eyes snapped open.  
  
From down the corridor outside the room, Aurora, Jamey and Xani Yue sat drinking tea as the noise started. There were shouts, but Xani and Jamey couldn't make out the words. Aurora could, and she only smiled mischeifly.  
  
"You really shouldn't have done that, Sis." Jamey sounded stern, but he was amused. Xani was as well, though she didn't show it.  
  
"I know. I just couldn't help myself. Atleast they have something to think about now. I have also instructed Miss Meryl's other Self to be more persistent. She will awaken soon, you know. Vash will have his hands full then. I should have told him she was decended from the Seconded most powerful of us."  
  
Jamey grimised. He'd met the cocky guy after Aurora had awakened. He and Sis were related, even though Aurora was a thousand years or so older than him. "That cocky guy? Where is he now?"  
  
Aurora just smiled. "Over seeing Meryl and Milly. He is their boss, the one I had keep an eye on the girl. Miss Meryl's power will rival his own, even if she will never been as powerful as me. Not that I care. I just don't want anyone else to go through what I had to." She was the Watcher, guardian to their secrets and 'Queen' of them all.  
  
~*~*~*A Few Hours Later*~*~*~  
  
As Aurora saw everyone off with Xani and Jamey at her side, she sent Wolfwood a message. 'Don't even think about reporting this to Knives or I will erase your memory of me as I did to Vash in July. Too bad his brother interfeared.'  
  
Wolfwood just glanced back and nodded, a little unnerved that the girl had the power to enter his mind.  
  
Meryl was still mad at Vash, who had his glasses on and was thinking about Aurora's story. Milly smiled happily, thinking of what to write in her next letter home.  
  
~The End~  
  
*`*`*`*`*`*  
  
A/N This is the last real chapter of this story. If you want a bonus party chapter with Vash & Co. and my OC, just reveiw. If you want to come tothe party, read the ending note in chap[ter five.  
  
Credits:  
  
All the people who reviewed me, thank you. Real Credits in bonus chapter, if you review. 


	7. Extra and a Party! YAY DONUTS!

**The Book of Donuts and Humor Extra: The Party**  
  
Disclaimer: .....Do you really think I own Trigun? If you did, go get your head x-rayed for squirrels.  
  
O/N: Thank you all for reveiwing. Here is the long awaited Extra that took too much time to type. That or I'm just lazy... ' Anyway, enjoy!  
  
_The Next Day, after all the incedents..._  
  
Aurora, called Shisha-sensei when she taught, hummed quietly to herself as she serveyed the party's room. Vash and his friends were coming to the school as shaperones for the end-of-the-year party. The redish blonde haired girl looked foward to their help, and it also gave her another chance to warn Vash about Meryl. Not that it would really happen, since she had a feeling something bad would happen at this party...  
  
A loud bang awoke her from her thoughts as some of her students came in to help. Smiling kindly at them, she began to take attendence.  
  
((A/N: OK...Anyone who reveiwed...well most anyone...will be here in the attendence thing. Some will come later.))  
  
"Laura?"  
  
"Here," answered a smiling black haired 17 year old. Tall but slight, with short hair and an intellegent aura, she was one of Shisha's best students.  
  
"Yuki Chan?"  
  
"Present," a figure from the shadows answered quietly. She was a hyper young girl who loved to do 'evil' things and laugh insanely.  
  
"Allen?"  
  
The quiet guy just waved at her as he usually did, leaning against the wall and going over some party details. He was a laidback kinda guy and the middle age (16) of most of her students.  
  
"Emily?"  
  
The other hyper 15 year old glanced up from playing with a strange black cat, a box of free donuts from the refreshment table next to her. Smiling genkily, "Hiya, Shisha-sensei."  
  
"Sets?" Vash's 'sister' glanced around for one of her oldest students.  
  
"Here," came the answer. He was making himself useful, as usual, hanging some of the forgotten decorations up before the party began.  
  
Nodding to everyone, their parttime teacher waited a few moments, counting in her head. 5...4...3...2...  
  
"Sorry I'm late!" two girls yelled at the same time. Tenshi Hikari and her friend Ashley rased in, slamming the door open so hard the wall bounced slighted. Ashley, in her usual attire of blue jeans and a t-shirt, brushed long brown bangs out of her aqua eyes and blinked. Tenshi, in a similair outfit, held her ever-present notebook tight to her chest as the black cat eyed her strangely.  
  
Shisha just sighed, leaning against the nearest wall and shook her head slightly. "You forgot the party, didn't you, Miss Ashley?"  
  
Smiling sheepishly, the 15 year old nodded her answer. "Sorry."  
  
Their teacher just smiled at them all, waving the appology off. "No need to be sorry. We have work to do!" And there was work to do, suprisingly.  
  
_A few hours later..._  
  
Vash and company, along with Xani Yue in her ever present kimono-type dress and Jamey walked into the school's gate. They were greated by a preacher asking them to take his young assistant to see his friend Shisha. Well, the priest was accually addressing Jamey, really.  
  
Nodding a 'yes', Shisha's brother smiled slightly as a young man in priest garb no older than 19 joined them. His ward waved them off, heading toward the town's church not far from the school's gates.  
  
"Hey, Clay," Jamey greated. The young man just nodded and followed them to Shisha's classroom all the way in the back of the school.  
  
They were greated with cheering and partying as they entered the huge room. Shisha sat, watching her students dance and enjoy themselves. That is: Tenshi Hikari, famous in the town for her love of poetry, being chaced by an unusal black cat; an odd young woman laughing manicaly as she munched on some cholate crackers; two girls, supposibly the youngest, dancing hyperly together to the loud music; and a few other young people talking and seemingly obliviuos to it all.  
  
The young man Jamey had called Clay walked over to Shisha, whispered something that she nodded to and joined the talking group.  
  
Wolfwood, smoking another cigerate, pulled Milly to the dance floor as more familair-to-them music began to play. The taller insurence girl giggled and danced at the same time, thinking about what kind of pudding she would have. She'd seen the veriety at the food table where the evil laughing girl was standing, and it still surprised and exited her.  
  
Xani Yui, glancing around, had been belindered. She didn't know what to do, really, having no sort of sociel life whatsoever outside of the Emerlandmyst mansion. She was startled when Jamey held his arm to her, asking for a dance. Moving with grace, they entered the dance floor just as a slow song began to play.  
  
Aquardly placing her hands around his slim neck, she caught his smile. Yui then remembered something Jamey had once said to her, "I may have the body of a child, but I am still a man." Blushing slightly, the pink tint noticable on her usually pale cheaks, she saw the smaller smile even more.  
  
As for Vash and Meryl, well, the donut luver had a hard time finding enough to satisfy himself. The shorter insurence girl had a little help from a hyper girl named Emily in hiding the gunman's sweet treasures. And when asked by Meryl where the pastries had gone, the 15 year old had just commented on how nice donuts lasted with a sweet smile.  
  
Durring all this, Aurora called Shisha just smiled down at them from her slightly higher platform, Seeing.  
  
_The Next Day, after the party...  
_  
Aurora, Jamey and some of her students that had gotten to know the Trigun crew waved Vash and company off. Xani Yui was being waited on by maids, seeing as something in the juice a certain evil hyper girl had given her made the poor thing sick yet again. Some of the other students that attended the party were sick as well, but for another reason.  
  
Note: Never give alchal to minors who can't hold it!  
  
As Vash walked off into the sunset, he heard to things. One was his sister's mind voice, 'If you ever need anything, just call. I'll try and help you, wherever you are.' After a moment of silence, 'Meryl will awaken soon, Vash. Bring her to me, if you can, when she does.'  
  
Two, the screams of Tenshi Hikari as the strange cat kept chasing her into the sunset ahead of them.  
  
_**Owari/The End of The Book of Donuts and Humor  
**_  
Credits and A/N: I would like to thank claymade, guardianangelolight, set17, sets, allen, laura, yuki-chan5, ur cool, and geranium for reveiwing. I hope you all liked this bonus story and know who your character is. '  
  
Anyway, if you want a sequel, just say so. In a reveiw.  
  
Click the review button. You know you want to. 


End file.
